A number of years ago when I was at university lots of people I knew started making those lists of 30 things they wanted to achieve before they turned 30. I gave it a go, but I couldn't really think of enough things to fill the list and ended up writing stuff down for the sake of it. I have no idea where that list went, I think I threw it away pretty soon afterwards as it really had no impact or meaning for me. This is the year though that I turn 26, next week to be precise, and as a friend reminded me recently I will now be closer to 30 than 20. I have to say though, that currently, it really doesn't bother me. I don't feel particularly different and I very much doubt I'll wake up on my actual birthday feeling profoundly changed. I do know though that I'm not going to attempt another 30 before 30 list. I find the idea of creating goals with deadlines counter-productive, for me anyway. If I don't achieve them then I'll just feel a bit crap about things, and it suggests the idea that you can't achieve certain goals once you're past a certain age. It's very similar to how I feel about new years resolutions as half the time with these things you set yourself up to fail.
That's not to say that I don't think anyone should make them, we're all different so of course what works for you might not work for me which is totally fine, one size does not fit all. There are of course things in life I want to do, things I want to work towards or create for myself, but in an ever more uncertain world (here's looking at you Brexit...) these things look unlikely to happen in the next four years, and that's completely okay. I know that I want the big things- to one day own a house, have cats and to share that life with another person. The timeline for all of those things is pretty hazy in my mind, these things all take an investment of time and money, although I am hoping the cat thing at least works out in the next few years. Knowing that certain things are difficult to work towards won't stop me from plodding towards them, but not giving myself a deadline to achieve these things by a certain age will help me not feel like a failure or that I'm lagging behind my peers. I think that having older siblings has shown me that things don't always happen according to a plan but it's okay, as even the awful things eventually work out.
Seeing how my sisters have navigated some big life hurdles has reinforced to me that we all take these things in our own time and while there may be setbacks these aren't always a bad thing. It's comforting to know that we as a society are ever so slowly reassessing our stereotyped ideas of how people's lives should be set out. Although as a woman many people can still be quite quick to remind you that your time is running out if you want children!
As I get older I'm learning to worry less about the stupid stuff, the people that annoy me and the things out of my control. That's not to say that I don't get thoroughly fed up when some days it takes me over two hours to get home because of traffic or diversions. Although I think that can often be attributed to my being hungry and wanting my dinner- as soon as that's in my belly i'm pretty chill again. Getting older isn't so great when you start noticing those really fine lines around your eyes, (anyone got good eye cream suggestions?) but I'm really enjoying the more 'settled' feeling age provides and the fact that I don't really give a f**k about the stupid things that once used to bother me.